My quiet space

For years now, I've made it a point to dedicate a corner of my bedroom to be a quiet space that is all my own. In that corner is an altar, my most sacred of spaces. I often sit at that altar and do Tarot readings, relying on my intuition and insight to bring life to the cards spread before me. Sometimes I light a special bundle of dried sage and smudge, or cleanse, myself with its perfumed smoke. Other times I light Nag Champa, my favorite incense, and just relish the process of quieting my mind.

Lately though, as I alluded to in my last post, peace of both mind and spirit have been elusive. I have my altar, equipped as it is with tools and candles and incenses, readily available for me ... yet I haven't made the time for it. For months now, I have been a stranger to my Quan Yin statue, my Tibetan singing bowl, my Tarot decks, and my many and varied candle votives. A place that normally brings such a sense of peace has suddenly become a burden, a drain on time that I just couldn't be bothered to spare anymore.

In the past few weeks, my wife has patiently prodded me towards it, sometimes going so far as to refuse to let me into bed until I've meditated - for as long or short a time as I deemed fit.

As the weeks have rolled on, my time at my altar has become just that: my time. My time to quiet myself before bed. My time to reflect upon my day. My time to just sit with the Goddess and be. I relish it. I crave it. I can hardly wait for my time to come around. I never put a time-frame on it; even five minutes of quiet reflection is time well spent. But lately? Lately I have been dedicating more and more time to my meditation.

Something Merry, my wife, said made me pause: When I am at peace with myself, it rubs off on her. Everyone around her notices - in the time that she has known me, she has been more at peace with herself than she ever has been before.

It is said that when a Chakra, or energy center in the Auric field of a person, is out of alignment, the attributes of that Chakra become skewed. Take, for instance, the Throat Chakra: balanced, it represents being able to speak your truth, boldly but still retaining that tenderness that knows when it is the right time and the right place to do so. Skewed, your voice becomes either too timid or too brash, both of which are ineffective ways of expressing the Self.

I have been skewing my gift - instead of simply bringing peace along with me to a situation or relationship, I have been trying to be a peace maker, attempting to force peace to flow into a situation about which I feel I have no control. I realized during meditation the other night that I need to release my need to be in control. It is only then that my natural gifts can flow freely and bless myself and those around me.


Those are my musings for the evening.

Blessed be.